I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
is it fun? or sober?
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
