You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
Randomize