love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
Randomize
