Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Randomize