hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
My balls are so social today.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
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