I'm laying in your front yard are you home
Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
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