I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize