You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
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