It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
Randomize
