everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
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