Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Randomize
