I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Randomize
