It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
I can't trust your balls anymore.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Randomize
