I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize