office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
Randomize