dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
