Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
I'm having to shit out rocks
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