i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
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