bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
The adults are the big ones right?
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Randomize
