I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
Both the cop and the paramedic were hitting on me while I was on the ambulance. My boob fell out and they just about had full on erections right there. They Came back two hours later to sign my cast with their phone numbers. #stillhotwhilebleeding
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
