I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
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