This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Randomize
