You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
