The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
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