"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
Randomize
