Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Randomize
