he wants to bone in the snuggie
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Randomize
