atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
Randomize