Me. At least after what I've been through.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
Ketchup is God's man juice
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
