When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Randomize
