North Korea, Best Korea!
fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
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