SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
Randomize
