Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize
