she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Randomize
