I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
