I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Randomize
