do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
