How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize
