At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
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