i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Randomize