Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
hell yes lets make some ravioli
Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
