I'm lost and stupid without you.
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Randomize
