He disabled his match.com account in front of me
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
Can I color on your dick again?
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
Randomize
