Got a toothbrush?
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
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