I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
