Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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