Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
