What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
