It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
