letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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